A fulfilling intimate relationship requires commitment, sharing, caring, and growing together as well as independently, given the independent growth doesn’t affect your relationship negatively. Both the partners need to be aware of the change in each other. This change should not be stopped. Most of the times the relationships falter because of the partners are not aware of this growth or they don’t allow this. The relationship silently keeps falling apart in the first case or in later case it turns into an abusive relationship.
For a person who feels victimized it’s difficult to look forward to any source of joy. A victim views every crisis situation or even a little problem as threat. The feelings of fearfulness, helplessness and hopelessness encroaches him. He doesn’t know what lies ahead of him and he’s convinced that whatever it is, it’s not good. He feels he has no control over the situation and the future looks bleak to him. These feelings make him powerless and unable to function properly.
If you are a victim of such a relationship and have been through fear and pain, then you can gain advantages of your difficult past experience. Accept and confront the emotional disturbances that you are facing. You will do that once you know how to turn your negative experiences into positive actions. This is a road to recovery and one the road from being a victim to a survivor it is necessary to face and overcome issues.
You need to talk responsibility and stop blaming others or making excuses. Your negative self-talk should be replaced by positive affirmation. Think about how you are going to take the necessary steps to eliminate the problem or solve it. You must accept that you are a part of issues you are facing; hence, you are the most important part of solution.
The situation you are facing will lower your energies, make you less confident, and might make you feel inferior or worthless. Remember the fact that you are an amazing individual. Find the ways that will make you feel that your existence matters. Ask yourself questions like what do you want to do, now that you’ve been through an experience, what do you want to make out of it? What do you want to learn? How you want this experience to contribute to life? Reflect upon these questions and remember ripple effect. What do you want to leave after you are no longer here? Something that resounds even long after you are gone. Decide how to make your existence worthwhile because there are a lot of people who spend their life aimlessly and there’s no point to that.
Keywords: victim, breakup, hopelessness, existence, relationship, survivor.
